5 on Friday

1. Do you consider yourself to be a good housekeeper? Why or why not?

A good one? I used to be a very good housekeeper before I got sick.. Now I have a fantastic cleaning lady who does that for me.. I like a clean house

2. Are there any household chores that you enjoy doing? If so, what and why?

I used to love vacuuming. And Ironing, ironing everything from dish towels to pillow cases.
3. Which household chore frustrates/angers you the most?

Folding laundry! So annoying.

4. When doing household chores, what do you do to make them seem less of a "chore"?

Well, it does feel nice to live in a really clean place...

5. Which chore do you find yourself doing most often, and why?

Tidying up stuff. I like having a tidy house, and I can still do light house work.

5 on Friday on Monday

1.  Do you believe in luck, fate or a higher being?
I believe in several forces at work in the universe, including luck and karma (which I don't believe are the same thing). Whether there's a conscious higher power is the one thing that I am sure of.
 
2.  Are you in control of your own destiny or someone else pulling the strings of your life?
I have a lot of control over my destiny, but obviously there are some things I can't control-- but I don't necessarily believe someone is controlling them for me so much as they're just circumstances that have happened at random or because of other people. For example, I didn't choose the circumstances of my birth, my gender, or my race, nor did I choose for the economy to be the way it is or for various plans of mine to have not worked out. (Naturally, if I planned them, I was hoping they would!).  Some things may be the result of karma or unforeseen consequences of my choices, but sometimes they just happen-- and how I weave them into the narrative of my life is up to me.
3.  What are your lucky charms if you own any?
I don't have physical charms for luck. However, I do have some superstitious behaviors-- though they ride a fine line with compulsion.

4.  Is the world really just a stage and are we merely actors on that stage?
If you want to think of it that way, sure. I think there are many valid ways to view reality and your life within it. Personally I like the idea that we're all handed a certain prompt (in the form of the circumstances we face in life) to use to write our life's story.

5.  Describe what happened on your "luckiest" day (positive or negative).
Since I consider luck to be related to random probability and completely independent of good works or skill, I don't think I've ever had a particularly lucky or unlucky day.

5 on Friday

1. What did you dream about last night?
No idea! I know I have dreams every night, but I rarely remember any of them. The last one I do remember was about three nights ago. 

2. Do you record your dreams in your blog or a journal?
I've written about one or two of them. Or three. Does that count?

3. Do you think dreams are messages our bodies are trying to tell us? If so, are you real big on trying to interpret all the details?
I think they're manifestations of things that are on our minds, but not necessarily messages. Even so, I think one can learn a lot about oneself if he or she can remember details of dreams. I'm not too concerned with trying to interpret mine.

4. Do you remember your first nightmare?
I have a vague recollection of something about to fall on me when I was little. I woke up screaming.

5. Have you ever had a recurring dream? If you did, what was it and what do you think it meant? I don't remember my recurring dreams. I just remember that they recur and that's pretty much it.

Making a Murderer

   I recently binge watched Making a Murderer on Netflix.  Yep all ten episodes.  What makes the documentary so fascinating — and hopefully you’re already aware of this — is that Avery had previously spent 18 years in prison for a crime he didn’t commit.
    I was convinced of a few things, that the justice system in Manitowod County Wisconsin is corrupt. I also am sure that they wanted to see Steven Avery back in prison.
Steven Avery is currently serving a life sentence for the gruesome murder of Theresa Halbach.
    Halbach was a photographer who went to his house to take pictures of an auto he was going to list in the Auto Trader magazine.  Her remains were found  on his property. 

Here are some basic things I know right now:

• Parts of Halbach’s body were found burned in Avery’s fire pit.
• Evidence of Avery’s involvement was found inside his home.
• There is DNA evidence tying the bullet found in the Avery garage to Halbach.
• Avery was the last known person to see Halbach alive.
• Police found her car, with blood on it and in it, left on the Avery family’s lot.
• Avery’s high-school age cousin, Brendan Dassey, confessed that he had assisted his uncle in murder of Halbach.

   Now, to believe Avery is innocent, a person must believe that an impossible number of conspiracies: for starters, the placing of the car, the blood, the body, the keys, and all other evidence. The cover up would have included two DAs and a large group of cops in two police departments. And while it’s not improssible that some of those involved might be morally capable of setting up Avery, It is doubtful at least to me.
I highly recommend this documentary, It is riveting.  

Coincidence

In the year 2016, a remarkable coincidence will take place----both Groundhog day and the State of the Union address will occur on the same day. This rare happening has special meaning.

One involves a meaningless ritual in which we look to an insignificant creature of little intelligence for insight into the future.

The other involves a groundhog....

5 for Friday

1  what is one thing about you that you hate?
I hate a messy house.  I can't concentrate when I'm consumed by junk everywhere.
2   what is one thing about you that you love?
 I love peaceful nights when my house is quiet, and a good movie to watch.
3   if you had to change one thing about you what would it be and why?
I would change my temper.  Sometimes I exaggerate problems and I only make them worse with my attitude.
4   one is one word that you would use to define yourself?
Down-to-earth. :)
5   imagine what you would look like in a perfect world.. what do you look like?
I would look pretty much like I do now only maybe a bit taller and a better smile.

10 Things I hope I have learned.

1. I learned that I judged others. Way too quickly.  I don’t like it.

2. I learned how strong I am. I knew I was strong. But, I tell you nothing has shown me that when we need to be strong we are  strong, nothing  like this journey has shown me.  I keep on going.

3. I learned the value of friendship.  I learned how much friends matter and how sometimes the best thing you can do for someone else is to simply show up. Sometimes it’s very hard to say help or yes or I need help and I am so grateful for those who would just help – plow my driveway, bring a meal or listen.

4. I learned to not feel shame. I think it’s easy to attach shame to one’s life based upon circumstances. When I was first diagnosed I felt such incredible shame. But, instead, I’m learning that this is part of my story and that my life can still be with deep meaning and joy.

5. I learned I am not alone. There are many of us in this life with stories that don’t match what we dreamed about. I learned that sometimes the lonely is felt because we all think we are alone but deep down inside we just haven’t shared. So I work to not hide where I am and what is going on.

6. I learned that my heart would break.  And not being able to fix things in a way that would take away the hurts. 

7. I learned that moments truly do matter. – it is the memories of family and laughter. 

8. I learned that I can do what I often thought I couldn’t. I know, how weird is that sentence? . I guess I hadn’t realized how dependent  I was until I had to do it all myself. So I learned to not grumble, but rather to just do. 

9. I learned to be grateful. Yes, yes, yes this. Grateful. Just for the moments in life that really matter. For the times when I would get a break. For good friends. For coffee. For new days and new opportunities. 

10. I learned how to have hope.  I’m not sure if I have to explain that or not, but know that I once lived in a very sad and dark space. I think I’ve really learned the truth of finding joy.

Because I know you've been wondering....

• I am not admitting how many times this month I have aimed the phone at the television and cussed when the channel didn't change.
• I stopped watching the weather three weeks ago.
• I happily wrote a check to the Wounded Warriors. You should too.
• My inability to suffer fools increases daily.
• I don't think I can wait until this election is over.  Campaign Fatigue.
• I am craving snow.  Wonder if it's coming?
• Did anyone ever see the movie, Gone with the Wind  Best  movie ever.  I actually saw it in a theater.  Pronounced "thee-ater" at the time.
• Everyone should make time to watch "Downton Abbey" .  It's that good.
• I have had the song "Friends in low Places" stuck in my head for what seems like weeks.
• Trying to decide if I like my new sound bar and if it helps.