Thoughts to ponder.

Soulmate sounds like something Satan puts in his coffee.
I always leave places the way I found them, only way messier
Has anybody seen my disposable income? I can't seem to find it.
Insomnia means never having to say you overslept.
I bet when Hugh Hefner dies no one will say "He's in a better place now."
I don't know who's in charge of putting the little "tear here" signs on bags of Planters Peanuts but they need to fire him.
There are 3 levels of pain. 1. Pain 2. Excruciating pain 3. Stepping on a Lego
I have a fear of speed bumps, but I'm slowly getting over them.
It's just occurred to me that I have never actually seen anyone lick their lips in anticipation of a good meal.
My apologies, I am now just blatantly wasting your time by typing absolute drivel