Precious

I finally figured out a way to get myself out of having to tell a small fib..you know the kind that you feel bad about...such as, "Do you like my hair?" and it looks like crap, or "Here's a picture of my baby girl,  Poopsie" who is far from cute. From now on, my answer will always be something like, "Ain't it precious?" or "She's so precious?" I'm not much up on the southern slang but I figure if I can add just a slight twang to it, it will sound believable. So, today, I vow that when someone asks if I tasted their new fangled concoction that tasted like hay, I will say, "I sure did and it sure was precious!" Even one better, when I really want to make it sound believable, I'm going to add the word "SO" to it. For example, "Didn't you notice? I got a boob job?" My answer, "That's SO precious!".  When it comes down to hurting someone's feelings, always head towards the "Ain't it precious?" statement but when it comes to eating manure like vegetables, be honest! Hell naw, I'm not eating brussel sprouts! I'd rather eat toe jam fresh from the bottom of a boy's locker room!!!