Why does my hair hate me? Other women have shiny beautiful bouncy hair. Hair that gets songs written about it. Hair that gets stared at. I have tried to take care of my hair. I have washed it, conditioned it, styled it, and brushed it. I have used all natural shampoo, beer and even overnight protein packs. And there you sit looking stupid AGAIN. Another day of me looking like I slept in the park. First of all, you’re blond at the ends, and gray at the roots. What happened? Why are there not blonde hairs left? How can something that can leave a permanent stain on my clothes, leave no mark on my head? Now about the cut, I have no extra money to blow so I have a stupid short haircut. I think about letting it grow long so I would have options. Riiiiiiight. Now I have seen women with beautiful hair so I know they exist. Rapunzel, Lady Godiva and even the Breck Girl. They have glorious fabulous tresses. Oh how I wish I could have them for just one day. But nooooooo you perch atop my head like a fuzzy lopsided stringy nasty dead chipmunk. You are the cockroach in the hot fudge sundae that is my life. So screw you, I’m buying a hat.
6 comments:
SOOOOOOOO FUNNY! I KNOW THE FEELING.....I BOUGHT A WIG ONCE,WORE IT ONCE AND IT SITS IN THE BOX....I HAD 4 TIMES THE NORMAL AMOUNT OF HAIR FOR AN OLDIE LIKE ME, AND I DID NOT LIKE THE STARES I GOT, SO I NEVER WORE IT AGAIN! DO YOU WANT IT? HA HA .... I SO ENJOY READIN YOUR BLOG, AND ALSO BOB G.
ROFL...hey, it happens to GUYS, too.
I was born with "two crowns"...(mom always told me that anyway), and I've fought the ALFALFA LOOK all my life.
Fortunately, as I'm aging, my hair is getting THINNER (nowhere near bald yet, though), so the problem is a lot less noticeable...(as is the nice head of hair I USED to have).
Hats?
...got lots of 'em!
What can I say .. I was having a bad hair day. I am trying to keep my rants down to a small whine. Thank you both for reading and commenting on my blog.
While I was in college, I had a barber tell me that I would never have to worry about being bald. He lied.....big time. The moon shining on my ball pate blinds low flying pilots. So, love your hair...every one of those little blond/grey suckers. They will be gone soon enough and there I will be, waiting to point and laugh at you. Hee hee! You are my fav. Love your blog.
Snakefoot
Oh my gosh! this was one of the funniest things i have ever read!! Gram you are so funny!!
I love you! You are my Favorite!!
Katie
Ethel?.....Ethel! Is it really you? I didn't know you were a blogger too!!
Snakefoot
Post a Comment